I.T. Consciousness Increasing Energy and Self Awareness

I read and read and read, write and write and write with the purpose of starting an action, but never I do. When that awareness comes to my mindfulness, I read and read and read, Write and write and write again. I do this to change myself.

I have read many books and texts that all say that they can help me become a better me. Many of them talk about journaling. So I got me a pen and paper and I Journal, for many, many years now. It has also been mentioned to go back into your notes and see how far you have progressed. I go back into my notes, sometimes just flicking through or going back to the day, 1yr, 2 yrs even up to 5yrs previous and realize that my handwriting has improved greatly, if I am mindful about it. I realize that over time my word understanding has greatly improved and that I am using some really intellectual words and phrases to describe what I am going through at that time. I have also come into the realization that no matter how big and intellectually sounding the words and phrases are, it does not change how I am feeling inside. What I have written many years ago, still remains the same, yet in a more intellectual way. I have the same thoughts and feelings, why am I not changing? Why am I not becoming more?

The bigger the word, the more sophisticated the phrase does not automatically change who I am. The more I read, yes, the more I learn. The more I write, yes, the more words that I have created. In the end, it has not changed who I am. It is a good start, but it is not the action needed for the change of meaning. That comes from inside, from my own perceived thoughts and knowledge, and not only my perceptions, but of my memories and experiences also.

What is needed, for me to change? Change what? I do know now that the word change is incorrect for the way that I describe what I have an urge and desire to do. I do not need to change myself, as many self help books I have read suggest. What is not needed is the need to change, but the desire to know myself. For many, myself included, change meant how I thought, how I saw and felt about the external world around me. It is not.

The desire to know one’s self is, I believe, a human condition that we all deal with on one level or another, to one degree to another. It is easier to change something in our life than to look within, understand and to love who we are. So, it is easier to read about how to change and fix our life, than to actually do. Even though, many written words over the course of our history do in fact offer a way to change and fix ourselves, to learn how to understand and to love our selves, we have to also know what feels best for us, and to actively incorporate that into our daily life, every day.

The bigger the word, the more complex esoteric* phrase *(understood for, or known by a select few) does not actively increase our knowledge of self, it only increases our knowledge, there is a difference. When we understand that difference, we begin to know our-self. That is my opinion, what do you think?

I have discovered for myself over time, that I have a need, a desire to learn and that I have interests in many different areas. And what I learn, I have a desire to also show others and to tell others of my new found information. I know that others feel and do the same thing, how? Because that is also a part of our human nature, to learn and to distribute information. Why I believe I have not been able to change after reading many books, attending workshops and seminars, listening to others tell me what I need to do? Much, if not all the information the I have digested is of an empirical nature, observations and experiences of others, either learned first hand or taught to them also. And, again, it is not a change, it is an understanding and knowing of my true self that I seek. Only then will change occur.

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself, just as I am, then I can change”

~ Carl Rogers~

Mindful March

For me it seems like the word Mindfulness is over used, miss-used and used for the sake of over complicating life. I hear the word “Mindfulness” being used in conversations that really have no context to the actual meaning of the word. Or, being used as a way to make another feel less than. But, I guess, that it my opinion.

Mindfulness can and does have many different views, and also, it all means the same, in the end.

Mindfulness is when one has an awareness of a particular thought, at the present moment, holding on to that thought and focusing their attention on to the fullness of that thought. Where it comes from, why it is there, how does it effect my next thought, what do I do with it, etc. This can seem like an over simplified explanation, and an over complicated one at the same time.

It does not need to take a lot of time, and also, it can take a lot. Mindfulness has various amounts of levels and degree’s to it’s understanding to each and every one of us. I would hope that anyone reading this post will come to realize that we can practice mindfulness and be mindful on the different levels and degree’s of mindfulness over the course of a day. What this means is that mindfulness can be used as a physical, mental, emotional and spiritual way to help one become more aware of themselves. Practicing different variants will increase one’s perceptions, knowledge and truth of who they are and why they are. This does go way more in depth, best explored after first getting into the habit of being mindful.

Mindful March Challenge.

I challenge any one reading this post to look for and discover different ways and meanings of being mindful in your life. By talking to different people and reading different articles on this subject and practicing that which you learn to see if any of them fit with who you are. Here is also one little extra hint….Mindfulness does not always mean in the form of meditation or deep thought. When one is learning about the abundance of mindfulness, a quiet spot were one can reflect on how it feels and what it means to them (meditation or deep thought) is very helpful in determining their understanding of mindfulness

For any extra guidance, support, questions or even just to comment on new revelations that you experience, you can post below or email me direct.

~Plato~(2000+ years ago)

“Nothing in the affairs of men is worthy of great anxiety.”

*Don’t sweat the small shit!*

I used to carry around so much worry, stress and anxiety, that I now believe was the cause for a symptom that had many doctors baffled and confused. I used to get a form of a rash, that was finally diagnosed to closely relate to the cold sore virus. Herpes simplex virus (HSV-1). I have gotten cold sore’s, on my lips, for as long as I can remember, during high school they were worse. I went through a very stressful time in my life where all of a sudden I had a huge break out of cold sore on my lips, which spread to my gums and tongue, arms, hands and fingers. Stomach area, genitals, legs and feet. My fingers would swell like sausages and I could not even use them. Angry red bumps all over the place that were sore and itchy. That’s all the details that I care to share, lets just say it was a very painful and annoying. After the first time, (which happened during a huge transitional period in my life in my late teens), this outbreak would happen two maybe three times a year, I could usually pin it to changing of a season and climate, and to after a time of anxiety and stress.

I used to have anxieties and stress, all the time, about stuff that I don’t even know why I even thought about it, but it usually had some form of indirect contact with myself, or it didn’t, and I could make myself believe that it did. And in the end, my worst thoughts never happened, or if they did, I still lived through it, Learned from it and gained new experiences. Don’t get me wrong!! I still stress and have anxiety, and wow, sometimes I can not believe that I would spend even minutes stressing about certain things, let alone hours, days and even weeks. I believe that I have, to some extent, learned how to control the degree at which I allow my thoughts to stress, and build into anxiety, and to remain fixated on certain elements that present themselves in my daily life.

Stress can cause so many other areas of concern, mainly anxieties and depression, just to name a couple. Stress can affect our thoughts, actions, moods, physical and mental health. The stress that we deal with everyday, that we allow¹, into our thoughts, not only affects us, but also those around us. Think about that, my stress affects my moods, actions and reactions and my health, but it can also cause some one else’s stress. This does not make me feel very good.

¹We allow certain thoughts to propagate in our mind, a lot of times with out even realizing it. They start unconsciously, a thought formed from an opinion, or a belief that we have, and then at random times, they float through our conscious thoughts. Becoming, at times, an irritant for our moral ego to feel vulnerable, causing unprecedented thoughts that increase severity of the outcome of the situation.

There is much available to help one deal with and to cope with stress, anxieties and depression. It is not easy. Everybody has it in one degree or another, and it is becoming common place to accept it as a legitimate mental health disorder.

As mentioned earlier, “I used to stress” all the time, about little things, about big things. Things that could effect my life, things that could affect another’s life, things that could make life hard, Things that could make me sad or feel hurt. I realized that most of my “stress” was in fact caused from fear based thoughts originating from ego. Low self esteem, low confidence in self, fear of rejection, and the fear of being humiliated in front of peers.

There is no one size fits all approach to how we cope with the disorder of stress and all of it’s effects. For me it started when I realized that it was within me to love myself and to be myself, and to know myself. Where I always looked for the respect and praise from the outside of myself, from other’s to tell me that I was doing good, that they appreciated me and what I was doing. This is what I used to affiliate my sense of worth and feel good to. This is what caused most of my stresses.

I still stress, oh boy, do I ever. Though, I now have developed an awareness of my thoughts that helps me understand why I am having certain thoughts that cause the stress. Still, I can spend hours and days “stressing” before I realize that it is causing an undesirable effect on my inside and outside self.

This is one of my journey’s, to understand my thought process and how it can affect my thoughts, emotions and actions. It is an adventurous ride, full of twists and turns, ups and downs, and one I know will expand my life, consciousness and energy.

Another one of my journey’s, is to share this information with other’s that have this desire, an urge to also expand their life, consciousness and energy. To guide and to support a form of ascension to a higher level of consciousness.

Please feel welcome to comment your thoughts on this topic.

“There is a Road, steep and thorny, beset with perils of every kind, but yet a Road. And it leads to the very heart of the universe.” So wrote H. P.Blavatsky about the metaphorical road that leads to enlightenment. But how can any road lead “to the very heart of the universe”?

There is so much Knowledge and wisdom, that one can certainly get overwhelmed and distracted from the shear volume of it all. I love the works of many, But, I would have to say that the works of HP Blavatsky has definitely increased my knowledge, and confusion, on many different aspects of existence. While I say confusion, I mean it in a way that inspires me to continue on with all the rabbit holes that one comes upon in the quest and love of wisdom. Yes, confusion, as to what is being talked about. I have found that with most occult and esoteric literature, one can not just sit down, read and become more enlightened and more wise. The material must need time to soak in, merge with one’s own ancient wisdom, memories and consciousness. Many times, (the confusion that I talk about), The pages that are read, While make sense in some far deep corner of conscious thought, confuse and literally make no sense at all. Until at a later time, a different reading, or another passage is read, and the confusion now make a little more sense.

I have found this to be my normal of philosophical readings over the past many years. I first realized this after my purchase of The Secret Doctrine, HP Blavatsky. I had a hard time following along, it was like I missed the first couple of books or teachings. Some where in the sleeping consciousness of my memories, the knowing that I knew what was being talked about. As Interest and curiosity persisted, I came across others, many others, to many to list, that would all of a sudden fill the gaps of confusion with understanding. From one author and one book to another, they were all synchronized for my understanding.

We are not meant to know all that there is in existence while embodied, we are meant to rediscover and to experience knowledge corporeally, over many life times. To learn anew, different purposes and meanings to life.

It is human nature, the need to acquire knowledge

Socrates

I believe that we are supposed to continue on learning, gaining new knowledge, new experiences, new wisdom, for our own development in this life, to add to our memories for the next.